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November 9, 1997

Today was awful. While I worked in the store this morning, who should walk in but my biological father. Naturally I was alone 'cause the grans were eating lunch. I tried to avoid eye

contact until he was ready to check out. Standing before me--my darkest dream. He's 36 now, but I can see why Althea loved him. And, I understand her a little better now that Kelsey and I have our own fiery relationship.  

    He said some awful things about my mother. I can’t believe he ever loved her.

Of course, I felt I had to defend her so I said things I shoudn't have then suddenly we were in a big fight. I shouted he was nothing but a sperm donor then threw a can of tomatoes. Hit the shelf. I tried again, but my aim was off. I broke the big front window with Johnson’s General written on it. I said something about having Gramps shoot him if he stepped foot in the store again. I was so filled with hatred I didn’t even know Kelsey stood behind me until he said something about taking my advice. He called me Thea.

    Dwayne softly said “I called her Thea.” And I saw a look of longing cross his face. A look so strong, it’s filled with misery. It made my heart ache. No, I’m not letting myself feel sorry for him. I will not! I started to throw another can of tomatoes, but Kelsey took it out of my hand. Dwayne left and I turned to Kelsey and cried.